I Am Yours

I am yours! Yes that's right! That's the truth! I do belong to Christ!! I was going to name today's blog, "Tears" yes tears, because for a large portion of my long 3 hour drive home tonight.... That is what I did, I shed a lot of tears! Tears for a tough ending to a day, because no matter what I do in the teaching realm... It never quite feels good enough, although I thought things were going so much better this summer for summer school in comparison to the school year, so with a lot of organization in place & a plan I felt pretty good about & a smooth 2 weeks with the kids proving to be productive... And successful.... It still wasn't good enough, I was still picked a part and told to do things differently.... Wow! That broke my heart! It's tough having a classroom where you really don't have the opportunity to be the teacher & have the say so! Don't get me wrong, I totally love feedback & want to give the kids the best, but my heart longs to be a teacher.... To have a say so and be allowed to do what I have been trained to do, be allowed to be a teacher, so I am grieving for the loss of what feels like the loss of opportunity to be the teacher, I always dreamed to be! 
My heart & mind also thought a lot about my family, which brought on more tears... Tears for the Loss of Jesus in our home, I grieve for my family! That they do not want anything to do with Jesus, that a home that once had Jesus, has now shoved Him out the back door, oh my heart longs that they may know Jesus, that they would be able to live in His freedom & peace... I also thought, "I don't really know How to live in a home where Jesus isn't the center..... Do I even have a friend to ask what it's like, what do I do?" So many questions!
    So those tears where shed, questions where asked & thought about.... What felt so lonely at first in those moments,   But NO! Satan those are lies straight from the pit of Hell! I am so not alone! So together, my Savior, my Jesus, my very best friend... We cried together, we talked it through, we prayed it out & we worshipped!! 
Don't always understand what is going in, might not always agree with it or even love it.... But even despite the Circumstances and the external.... I have a Jesus that is my truth & security & we will continue to work through this together!!! 
I have faith & believe that in Gods way & timing  I will have a job that I love and my family will love Jesus & His truth! 

But no matter what, I will continue to proclaim:
 Here I am before You, falling in love and seeking Your truth

Knowing that Your perfect grace has brought me to this place

Because of You I freely live, my life to You, oh God, I give

So I stand before You, God

I lift my voice cause You set me free

So I shout out Your name, from the rooftops I proclaim

That I am Yours, I am Yours

All the good You've done for me, I lift up my hands for all to see

You're the only one who brings me to my knees

To share this love across the earth, the beauty of Your holy worth

So I kneel before You, God

I lift my hands cause You set me free

So I shout out Your name, from the rooftops I proclaim

That I am Yours, I am Yours

All that I am, I place into Your loving hands

And I am Yours, I am Yours

Here I am, I stand, with arms wide open

To the One, the Son, the Everlasting God